Praise God we finally have Hannah. Our meeting was not a dream meeting but more like the worst case scenario I had semi-prepared for. She screeched and screamed for I’m not sure how long. We held her and rocked and sang while she continued to holler. Finally Eric got her to calm down. Every time the nannies came into eyesight, she would start up again. We know this is good in the long run, because she had attached to someone at her orphanage but it is so heart breaking to endure. I think about what it would be like if someone who didn’t speak any English came and took Gabriel away. What would his little mind be thinking? As I cried today at our meeting it wasn’t because the meeting wasn’t as I expected, it was because I was hurting for her and I didn’t know what I could do to help her.
By the time we left the Civil Affairs office she had warmed up to us and was smiling. Great, I thought. We got some noodles for dinner and she smiled and let both of us feed her. Once we got to our room, though, she was again, very scared. We have had alternating wailing for long periods of time with short bursts of happy looks, smiles, and kisses. She completely clings to me (Tif) and will not let go. She makes eye contact and holds me rather than fighting me, so I know that is great. However, it is 10:00 p.m. our time and she has yet to let go of me. I am tired and Eric is tired. He is somewhat like a father whose wife is in labor – really wanting to alleviate my pain, but having no way to accomplish it. I know this is just as hard for him.
It’s only Day 1, I keep telling myself, but I am so tired and emotional, it’s hard to keep perspective. I read in Daniel today for my time in the Word before we got Hannah. Daniel chose to continue to believe and obey God even when his life was on the line. He spent the night in the lion’s den. I have asked God to help me have faith even if it means a night with the lions. This time the lions are just a scared little girl and my own emotions. And maybe it will be more than a night. I also was reading in 2 Timothy these words of Paul: “So I was rescued from the lion’s mouth. The Lord will rescue me from every evil deed and bring me safely into his heavenly kingdom. To him be the glory forever and ever. Amen” I will trust in my Lord. He will rescue me.
Well, Hannah is finally asleep as I finish this post. I pray we can all rest tonight. His mercies are new every morning.
4 comments:
Each day WILL get better and bring new smiles and soon you will begin to see the "real" Hannah emerge. It will be glorious! God has followed you through all of this and He is with you even now.
Love,
the Bradfields
Hey guys,
I know that Jen emailed. It does get better. The jet lag doesn't help with all the emotions. We will continue to pray for you. Hannah will do fine...Hang in!
For those God forknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.
What then shall we in response to this? If god is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all--how will he not also along with him graciously give us all things?
Ric
Praising the Lord for Hannah (she is beautiful) and praying for her adjustment into your wonderful family. May she sense God's love and care for her. We love you and are very excited to see you return.
"We ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies." Rom. 8:23
By the way, I love the song on your blog by Tenth Avenue North. My son, Luke, got me interested in them. It's now one of my favorite contemporary Christian album!
See you soon!
Grace and peace,
Doug and Cindy
She is beautiful - praying for you!
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